The Loss of a Hard Drive

I've recently lost a hard drive worth of data. I lost roughly 80GBs of replaceable data, and managed to recover all of the data I lost that was irreplaceable. Either way, it is one of the many distractions that have come up with every day life, and just like how you (may or may not) have enjoyed my regular 3 day interval posts, sadly, that has to come to and end as I am now coming up on what must be among the most difficult set of exams yet.

I haven't actually seen the papers or have that much of an idea of how difficult they are, but I think that if I fool around any more, I'll be quite dead when exam time rolls along. This is coupled with other factors like gaming and writer's block - so expect a disruption in the scheduling of posts - again.

Blogging isn't an essential part of my life, and so takes very low priority. And yet again it will suffer erratic updates.

Funny E-mail

I got this in my e-mail about a week ago entitled 28 + 4 ways to know if you're Chinese Since I am Chinese, I found this e-mail really amusing - so I thought why don't I write a blog post about it and make comments on how much of it is true? 1. You unwrap gifts very carefully, so you can save and reuse the wrapping (and especially those ribbons). - I do this, but it's actually because I like keeping things the way they came in. My friends in Melbourne gave me Singstar for my birthday - we've already opened it and used it, but I'm still keeping it the exact way it came - except for the game's plastic wrapping, which is too thin to be salvageable. I found the few times I kept anything to reuse the wrapping, I never used them. -__-

2. When there is a sale on toilet paper, you buy 100 rolls and store them in your closet or in the bedroom of an adult child who has move out. - I don't buy that many rolls since I'm living alone, but when I'm at home in Malaysia, we do have this huge stockpile of toilet paper, but my family goes through toilet paper pretty quickly, so it's more because we don't want to visit the store that often rather than because it's cheap.

3. You keep a Thermos of hot water available at all times. - I don't have a Thermos since I don't drink hot drinks often enough to bother.

4. You save grocery bags, tin foil, and tin containers. You use the grocery bags to hold garbage. - I think this is what every student does with their grocery bags. It's hardly sensible to go buy garbage bags when you get bags for free in a significantly more manageable size.

5. You hate to waste food - as a note, I do waste food and it's usually rice. Australian Chinese restaurants give you WAAAAY too much rice.

a ) Even if you're totally full, if someone says they're going to throw away the leftovers on the table, you'll finish them.(Your mom will give a lecture about starving kids in Africa) - indeed I was given this comment before, but that was when I had appetite problems about 14 years ago and still didn't eat it anyway LOL.

b ) You have Tupperware in your fridge with three bites of rice or one leftover chicken wing. - I hate leftover food, especially if it wasn't meant to be leftover.

6. You don't own any real Tupperware-only a cupboard full of used but carefully rinsed margarine tubs, take out containers, and jam jars. - I don't own any real Tupperware because it's too expensive. I do however have IKEA containers. :P

7. You have a collection of minature shampoo bottles that you take every time you stay in a hotel. - Guilty as charged!

8. You wipe your plate and utensils or wash them in a small basin of hot water before you eat every time you go to a restaurant. - if only Chinese restaurants here were that nice.

9. You own a rice cooker and a slow cooker. - I didn't own a rice cooker until last year, and I didn't own a slow cooker until my neighbour abandoned his at my place.

10. You wash your rice at least 2-3 times before cooking it. - I thought this was normal?! Starchy isn't a quality you usually want with rice.

11. You fight (literally) over who pays the dinner bill. - It's a strange habit to fight, but Chinese don't like to lose face.

12. You have a teacup with a cover on it. - I don't even have a teacup.

13. If you're under age 20, you own a really expensive walkman if you're over 20, you own a really expensive camera. - I have never owned a really expensive walkman. Even now the most expensive music player I own cost me AU$120. Hardly even close to what an iPod costs. I don't have an expensive camera, I do plan to get one, but not until I need it. My cheapskate camera will have to do until then.

14. You're a wok user. - Heh.

15. You only make long distance calls after 7pm. - Long distance calls? Come on - we're more stingy than that -> Skype.

16. You prefer your shrimp with the heads and legs still attached - it means they're fresh. <- XD

17. You never call your parents just to say hi. - Guilty. :P

18. If you don't live at home, when your parents call, they'll ask if you've eaten, even if it's midnight. - Indeed a strange habit, but they always do it. In the case of chewxy or me, sometimes we really haven't eaten at midnight, so not that strange a question I guess.

19. Your parents tell you to boil herbs and stay inside when you get sick. They also tell you not to eat fried foods or baked goods because they're heaty (yeet hay in Cantonese). - My family doesn't believe this, and doesn't really believe in herbs either. I find that walking outside usually makes you feel better, but Malaysia's hot weather, and Melbourne's random weather usually make you better off staying inside.

20. You e-mail your Chinese friends at work, even though you only sit 10 feet apart. - I IM my housemate (applies to both kl and my current housemate), who is physically 2 meters away.

21. You always cook too much. - I cook too much because my estimation sucks. Bleh.

22.You eat every last grain of rice in your bowl, but don't eat the last piece of food on the table. - True in most cases - the last piece of chicken, the last piece of tofu, the last piece of vegetable usually goes round the table like 20 times before someone finally takes it, and usually not without informing the whole table LOL.

23.You starve yourself before going to all you can eat buffet. - The last few times I went to a buffet I did eat properly before then. It's usually the opposite - you can't eat anymore after that for at least most of the day.

24. You know someone who can get you a good deal on jewelry or electronics, computers. - I also know where to source Magic cards and completely random items like consoles and modchips. o_O

25. You own your own meat cleaver and sharpen it. - I don't have a meat cleaver, I'm too lazy to cut meat myself.

26. Your toothpaste tubes are all squeezed paper-thin. - I thought that was normal too - being a stingy student.

27. You know why this list consists of only "28" reasons. - My favourite number is 4, so I obviously don't care.

28. You take this message and forward it to all your Chinese friends. < ----- See blog.

There are four more indications that you need to add:- *29 You wrap with napkins all the knives, spoons and forks of the airline that you fly on and put in your travel bag as souvenirs - I don't do this, stealing is still frowned upon, in my opinion.

*30 You never forget to take with you all the unused bath and facial tissues when you check out from the hotel because you believe that you have paid its all. - I only take it if there's a chance the next hotel doesn't give me enough toilet paper. You won't believe how many times I've actually been saved by this small bit of toilet paper.

*31 You will laugh at yourself when you read all of them - ROFL

*32 And you will always proud because you're Chinese - Indeed.

Deciding on a Place to Live

When you're a overseas/interstate student - there might come a time you might have to move - be it by your choice or otherwise (like me), and then you have to look for a place to live. However - if you're a student - your choices might not seem too obvious. I'll be talking mostly about my situation - so no general examples. Usually - you've already decided on the location you want to live in, or the proximity to the university you want to live in. So what considerations might you have?

1. Rent - The most important of all considerations. This is ultimately the base number you are going to be paying every month - and hence the number you will want to adjust to other considerations.

2. Bills - How much of the bills are included in the rent? Is water included? Is gas included? Is electricity included?

3. Furnished status - if you're not a student, there's no question - you want the place unfurnished. Otherwise, you'd probably have a choice to make. If it's furnished - you'll want to see what you get. Do you get a microwave? What about the size of the fridge? And the bed? Are there enough tables and chairs - or will you need to supplement it?

4. Size of the place - higher rent usually means more space - but remember that while you will be willing to pay more for more space - the landlord/agent is sometimes annoying - and intends to mislead you into paying more for less space. Careful.

What haven't I put here? There are a lot of other non-student assumptions, but let's say you are a student. That usually means - you don't need a car parking space, you don't care too much about your Internet service, you don't need a phone and you have to do laundry (LOL if you don't). I've searched for places at least twice now - and I usually found myself having to compared non-equivalent place.

I have furniture - but I believe here's rule number 1 - it's a sunk cost. Don't care about it. If it will cost you more to continue using your own furniture, give up on it. It's just not worth it to care about it. Not to say you shouldn't care - my cost of moving into a place that's unfurnished is smaller since I have furniture. If the place ends up being $200 a month more expensive just because you want to use your old furniture (which could happen if you have to move from a shared to a single bedroom/studio), it does build steadily - and in a year, that $2400 could've bought you a whole new set of furniture and appliances - so don't fall for sunk cost - since absolute cost does matter. Getting attached to your $800 bed doesn't help you. I've used it for more than a year - so it cost me $15 a week, or $2 a day if I were to just count the year I used it - yes I didn't use it the whole year - but I pay for the apartment then too - we want a comparable measure. If I were to spread it over the 17 months I have paid for the apartment - then I would have paid roughly $11 a week and about $1.60 a day.

$1.60 a day for good sleep is hardly anything to complain about - anyway - back to a benchmark. As my benchmark - I decided to take all my furniture and appliances with zero salvage value after one year. This means dividing everything into weekly expenditure so that I can get a value represents (in my benchmark) how much I actually paid to live this place.

While you can argue that furniture and appliances do last longer than year, remember that I'm not moving out by choice. It's a loss I already accepted a long time ago. So, using all this (the amount I paid for stuff and dividing it by weeks - we have a cost closer to - $27pw. Hold your horses! This includes shared value in a laundry - readjusting this value gives me $21pw. How much do I actually value a personal laundry facility though - $9 a week (I won't explain how I got to this number - but let's say that's roughly how much it would cost me in a laundromat). It doesn't matter - what this number is - since I am completely ignoring it in my adjustment.

My place is underpriced market wise. That means that as long as I choose to move to a similar/equivalent place - my rent will increase - by a lot. I can't be doing analysis by using my current place as a benchmark since I can't stay in my current place. Know your options well - and never ever compare to an option you don't have.

Some people derive utility from just having a housemate. I don't. I derived utility when kl was my housemate - but not with my current one. Having a housemate almost automatically removes utility I gain from privacy - so in this case my current housemate gives me a disutility from having him around. (No offence to him, of course, it's just that an extra presence causes that.)

OK - enough with the rants - it's time to look at number.

My share of the rent: $190pw Furniture + applicances: $21pw

So that makes: $220pw

I ignore internet costs/gain - because even if I am a geek - internet doesn't matter that much as I'm still a student. I don't play games online, and even if I'm a heavy downloader, I don't need to download all that much.

OK - so moving to College Square Swanston (at $260pw) will actually cost me $40 more per week than accomodation cost me last year the $3 is from an adjustment for laundry. I went to inspect a significantly smaller studio unit at Unilodge@740 for which the asking price was $275pw. This will cost me $46 more a week (minus $9 for laundry). Well being both smaller and more expensive - I would be insane to say that this is superior - even if it comes with internal laundry.

And then we have Arrow on Swanston. The last time I e-mailed them about a studio - they wanted to rent one to me one was available only until 30th Sept - for $316pw. However - note this includes utilites of $50 so let's adjust that downwards - so the rent is $266pw. So moving here - would cost me... *you guessed it* $46 more per week.

Currently - the most dominating option would be to - move out with my housemate. There are problems with this though - I am willing to pay more to live alone - not otherwise. Rental has gone up crazily - and a good 2 bedroom (should you be able to find one) will likely cost you $450pw. That means that my cost will increase (on an absolute level) by merely $35 per week!

On another note, the absolute increase in cost should I move to CS Swanston is $70 pw. Hardly cheap - however, it's not expensive - especially if you were without furniture to begin with. As for me - I'll keep looking.

NOT. My landlord has agreed to have me stay until the end of my university term. YAY!!!

Catching Up On Anime and Manga

I realised I haven't been posting much about anime lately. I'm no longer following Bleach, and the two series I was following - CLANNAD and kimikiss pure rouge - have ended their runs. On the other hand, I've been switching to manga. Manga consumes less of my time, although I can't read it before going to sleep since reading manga consumes considerably more brainpower than watching anime does - which translates to more difficuity falling asleep.

I stopped following CLANNAD and Kimikiss when I was in Malaysia, and I've finally caught up with the endings - and I'm quite satisfied with both. CLANNAD is getting an AFTER STORY arc which is really great news - and the Bleach manga after so many months of fighting - has given us a little back story.

What does that translate to? More studying and more gaming. The course finally has got the difficulty slope I was looking for - and I'm bloody happy about it. I've done slightly more gaming, given the few RPGs I haven't completed yet.

I still have the move (of accomodation) to worry about, so unfortunately those few good blog post ideas I had will have to wait until later. Don't worry, I still remember that I haven't written that Nintendo Wii gaming cost estimate and revisit of my old analysis. And just so I won't forget - I'm going to write a post about going to uni (not what it sounds like).

Chances are I'll post more when I've found and confirmed a new place to move into - expect photos of the new place - and I'll probably be less anxious then, so my posts should take on a lighter tone. Until then, if you see an unannounced hiatus - you know why.

Reflecting Back on the Past

Somehow, I stumbled upon this again:Down Memory Lane at chewxy.com This makes me realise the number of life changing decisions (or maybe not so life changing) along the way.

1. Deciding not to pursue programming as a career - I have no lack of confidence in my programming skill. Unlike some of our DGX colleagues, chewxy and I chose not to go that way. I don't know about chewxy, but I made my decision based on some (peculiar) impressions. I wasn't interested in sitting around in front of a computer screen coding for days to meet a deadline. As much appeal as programming had for me, I decided that I would keep programming as my hobby, not my job. To me, I suppose the biggest turnoff was actually doing the degree.

The first year of a programming degree would have been hellish to me. A commerce degree where I knew little of (actuarial science is radically different from standard commerce, believe me) was boring enough for the first two years. I did do one first year programming subject. It probably wasn't the best subject to gauge my performance with, but it certainly wasn't the worst. Doing that class convinced me I hadn't made the wrong choice to forgo getting a programming degree.

Some people might relate to this: imagine going to a class where you knew every damn thing the lecturer was going to explain. You knew it so well, you could replace him/her if they were sick (in my case, I could replace the replacement which did come, and taught painfully badly). Imagine this is true for six hours of class every week. Imagine you have four of those types of classes every week for a year.

2. Deciding to go for actuarial studies: If you asked me more than five years ago what I'd be studying - I would've said accounting/finance. In 2004, I made the decision to pursue my studies in actuarial studies. I decided I fit the bill perfectly. I loved mathematics, had the bit of programming to give me that edge - and most importantly, it promised difficulty and challenge. Not the difficulty of memorising thick books of accounting regulations and laws, but the difficulty of math and logic.

Now if you ask me what I should've done - I'll now say pure math. I realise now I wouldn't have been happy doing an accounting course. That being said, doing actuarial science wasn't exactly the greatest compromise - but it was a fairly good one, considering the information I had then.

3. Going to DGX-DCC: Back in 2001, this seemed like an arbitrary decision. There weren't many competitions for young computer geeks like us, and it was between this and the ComQuiz. My friends and I went to every ComQuiz, but the best thing that ever came out of that was me being Top Scorer for the State of Selangor in the last year I participated. It was inconceivable to me then that I would ever make finals for the DGX-DCC.

The ONLY programming language I knew then was Visual Basic. My grasp of programming structure and layout and objects was dodgy at best. I went for BitBlt instead of DirectX (yeah, imagine how stupid that sounds now) - and I submitted only an incomplete game engine. I think I probably won the contest for worst developed program (and probably worst program too). Of course, there was a good reason for that - it was a public exam school year, and I didn't think I had a chance in hell of making it in.

So you can imagine what kind of surprise it is when you get a phone call saying you got into the top 15 finalists. That competition taught me a few things about myself: I wasn't as bad as I thought I was - and - our kind were a rare breed. While it had no direct effect on my life, it probably changed my life indirectly - and in more ways than one. (I'd learned that there are people better than you a long time ago - DGX merely altered how high up I saw myself - but in no way are they you - and that makes a whole lot of difference.)

4. Choosing between Australia and the USA: while I've never talked about it before - in 2004 I was faced with a very real and life-altering choice besides my degree. Do I go to a top ranked uni in Australia - or to a less popular one in the USA? I must say that even now, I do not truly know the right answer to that question - but I will know in five years time - so remind me. ;) Even within Australia, there was the question of whether I should've gone to Sydney, Melbourne, or Canberra. In the end, I picked the one with the best looking name (from a Malaysian's point of view, of course): the University of Melbourne.

5. The Mac + Consoles decision: While we'd never truly know what the outcome would've been otherwise, my decision to switch to the world of the Macs most certainly has changed my life. It was from the humble Mac that I started my decision to switch to console gaming. Two years later - I now know it was the right choice. My PowerBook G4 despite being old and outdated - still has no equal in my house, even with my numerous borrowed PCs and consoles.

I'm unsure as to whether the choice made me more of a tech geek/nerd than a normal PC laptop would have, but I am certain that I have no regrets going down this path. It was a good decision - and one no one should ever turn back on. Console gaming has most certainly overtaken PC gaming - and in a BIG BIG way. Sadly, I chose the Mac to reduce my gaming. Look at how much gaming I'm doing now. Oh well, at least I don't drink, smoke or gamble, I guess.

6. The decision to live: Anyone who's been following my blog ever since it's conception and existence will know that I once spoke loads of morbid thoughts on my blog, speaking sometimes of a depression. I have only confided in one person of this - and it isn't chewxy (or anyone I've ever mentioned on this blog, actually). In fact, if you read my blog, which started in 2002, that was actually towards the end of the cycle. Oh, how childish I used to sound on my blog.

The problem probably began escalating somewhere in the year 1999, and then I realised it in 2000. I'm quite sure everyone has contemplated suicide at some point - and it will always be very real - and the fine line between thinking about it and really doing it is scary. Really scary. There are things that are wrong with life you cannot fix. It is during this kind of times when you question your purpose of existence (for which there is no good answer, as I have realised oh-so-many years ago) and whether you have a reason to keep on living (I've never found one up to now strong enough - so I'll doubt anyone at my age has.)

Thankfully, past some point, you find a way to cope usually you can only find in faith. It doesn't matter what kind of faith it is, it doesn't even have be a religion. The faith that you do have a purpose you haven't found yet - and that you will help somebody somewhere no matter how insignificant at some point in time - is more than enough. It will never be bulletproof - never expect it to be - because a set of the wrong things at the wrong time will trigger it again - and it will hit harder.

The human brain is an interesting monster - with maturity comes a new understanding of life. It's entirely possible that my suicide ideation was no more than just that - but the amount of mental development it brings to the table is immense - and that probably steered me in the right direction for my future. Life is too short to be unhappy.